The House That Made No Sense

A woman who has made a decision moves completely different than the woman who is just hoping for something to happen. The woman who has decided, she's asking different questions, she's having different conversations, she's aligning herself with people that match where she's going, and she says the thing out loud that she wants to the people that actually might be able to help her. A hoping woman is not doing those things. There's a difference.

She's noticing the things that are going to help her get to the next point. Welcome to the Unblocked Woman podcast. I'm Amy Sanders. For years, I believed the next level of my life and business would come from a better strategy, working harder, figuring out that perfect plan.

But eventually, I saw the real truth. The biggest ceiling in our lives is not strategy, it's identity. The patterns we don't see, the subtle ways we play small, the version of ourselves that we keep defaulting back to even when we know capable of more. This podcast is where we bring those patterns into the light.

We talk about identity, leadership, growth, and what it actually takes to become the woman who can truly hold the life and business she wants. No fluff, no performance, just honest conversation about stepping fully into your power. So go ahead and subscribe and follow the show. And remember, the moment you see the pattern, you can finally break it.

I want to take you back to two weeks into dating my husband. My husband and I were doing what we call dream building, where we drive past fancy, nice neighborhoods, and we look at the houses, and we talk to each other about which one we like. And we had been dream building for hours, going from neighborhood to neighborhood. And to be honest, I was like, kind of nauseous from being in the car for so long.

And then we saw it. We drove past the house. And when I saw it, I was completely in love with the house. We got out of our car, and we started taking pictures of this house from every angle.

And when I say every angle, I mean, every angle. They had kind of like a cement wall. And we got up on the wall. We climbed the wall and walked to the side of the house, to the back of the house.

Were we trespassing? Yes, we were. But I had to capture every point of that house because it just felt like me. It felt like the house.

And after we drove away, we didn't even remember where we saw that house at. We had no idea because we'd got a neighborhood to neighborhood, city to city, but we had pictures of it in our phone. And when Chris proposed, he put that house in a book that he proposed to me with. It was just part of our dating that he stuck in the book.

When we saw that house together, we had been dating for a couple weeks. We had no idea what our future held. I had no idea if I would be with him long term or not. And then he proposed.

And there was the house in the book. But we couldn't find it again. We had no idea where it was. Fast forward to about a year into our marriage.

So this is about a couple years later. We are looking for lots. Finances are really tight. We are doing all the things you do in a blended family.

There is alimony to pay. There's child support. There's child to pay. There's also our family living under.

It was like you're basically you're providing for two families. My point is math did not make sense at all. It did not make sense. Yet we're driving around again.

And somehow we happen upon that house. This time, I went straight up to the front door. I knocked. The owner answered.

He gave me the information about the house. And we decided we would build our own house. The math did not math. None of it made sense.

None of it. None of it made sense the minute we saw the house the first time. None of it made sense as we started going down the steps to build the house. And when we started building it, it somehow made less sense because now there were numbers attached to everything that went in to build the house.

And I was sitting there with a spreadsheet that didn't really make sense looking back at me. We ended up doing a lot of sweat equity to get in the home and there were a lot of hoops that we had to jump through. It was not a piece of cake. Now, there was a version of me who would have driven past that house and said, someday.

But this version of me wanted that house. She wanted the dream and she kept going through the whole process even though it did not make any sense at all. Today, I am recording this podcast episode inside the house and I still love this house. Today, as I record this podcast episode, my book comes out.

The paperback version, the hard copy version, all of the versions are out. The ebook, the whole thing, it's out, it's real and you can go get it in about four minutes. You can even pause this podcast episode, go get it and come back. So, today, as the book comes out, I want to talk about the two things that these two things have in common because it isn't luck and it isn't manifestation in the way that we imagine manifestation to be.

And I promise you, it was not a perfect plan that we had mapped out and had every step of the way neatly defined. It was much different than that. So, here's what I've noticed in my own life. Every single thing that I am proudest of, started as something that did not make sense on paper.

The house that I just talked to you about that we now live in, the pool that's in our backyard, which was another stretch. Why did we have to get a pool? I don't know. I just wanted one.

I wanted it for good reason. When we started thinking about the pool, we knew we wanted a pool someday. But when we were in Thailand in 2019, I remember thinking, I don't know, I don't know, I don't know, I don't know, I don't know, no, I think I want a pool this year. We were in Thailand in February of 2019.

We had the pool finished by August of 2019. 2020 was when COVID hit and we were so, so glad that we had that pool. But that pool happened fast and it happened fast because I didn't know what the next step was, but I took the next step and I followed the next step with faith that we would figure it out. And we did figure it out.

And now the book. I said it out loud for the first time in Singapore in 2019. And I was so embarrassed saying it to my husband that I really didn't talk about it again. It was on my mind, but I didn't really talk about it again.

So here's the thing. I do believe in energetic pull. I don't know how you can't believe in it if you believe in science because it's been proven that there is. Energetic pull.

Everything carries a charge. And I do think that when you're lined up with something like some possibility and you're lined up with it and you have no idea how you're going to get there, the path starts revealing itself to you. And I have watched this way too many times to stand here and pretend like it's not a thing. It is a thing.

But I also want to say that I don't believe that every hard thing that's happened to you is because of your frequency was off. I don't believe that women get sick. I don't believe that women get sick because they weren't grateful enough. I don't believe that, you know, you lose your marriage because you're not aligned.

Any of those things, your businesses fell. I don't believe any of that. But I do think that alignment is a position. It's not just a move.

It's a position. And when you take it, two things start happening at the same time. The first one, it's practical. You can see it and you can watch it happen.

A woman who has made a decision moves completely different than the woman who is just hoping for something to happen. The woman who has decided, she's asking different questions. She's having different conversations. She's aligning herself with people that match where she's going.

And she says the thing out loud that she wants to the people that actually might be able to help her. A hoping woman is not doing those things. There's a difference. She's noticing the things that are going to help her get to the next point.

The second thing I want to say is that I don't believe that women get sick. I don't believe that women get sick. The second thing is that there is a pull. And when you stop hedging and you genuinely start lining up with something, things can arrive in ways that can literally blow your mind and a lot faster than you thought could happen.

The conversation that took you and your business to the next level. Timing that made absolutely no sense. The timing of putting in our pull made zero sense. We did it anyway.

A person who says the exact sentence that you needed that way, that's energetic pull. So here's the truest way that I think that I can say what I am taking a while to say. Is you don't attract what you want, you become available to it. So it can feel like you are attracting yourself to it.

But really, it's just that you've been able to learn how to hold more capacity and you become available to it. Misalignment doesn't make it impossible. It just makes it a little harder. You can absolutely white knuckle your way through something that you're not aligned with and it will feel heavy and hard through the whole time.

You can do that. And I've done it many, many times. The cost just shows up later and it shows up in you and as you. But when you're aligned, it feels different.

The path arrives and it arrives in peace and it arrives in peace and it arrives in peace and it arrives in peace and it arrives in peace. Never the whole map. It's like driving a car in the dark and you just see that one line ahead and on the road and you just keep driving, watching that line. But it does show up and it does show you your next turn.

So I want to tell you another story. And this one is about my daughter. So my daughter decided that she wanted to move to Europe. And she has said this for probably a bit.

I don't know. I don't know how long it's been on her heart, but probably for a year. She's been saying, someday I'm going to move to Europe. Well, back in July, she decided that she was going to move by fall.

Now, at the time, she did not have a steady job. She was working part-time, hardly hours, making hardly any money at a golf course. And she had nothing figured out. Now, in order to move to the Netherlands, you have to pay right around $6,000 just for the visa alone.

And then obviously there's living expenses and all of the other things. And then you have to pay $6,000 for everything. So at the time, she admits to having about $1,800 in the bank. That's it.

That's all she had. But she decided that she was going to do it. Now, she also has this boyfriend and he did talk to us saying, I don't know how she thinks she's going to do this. Like, I don't think it's going to happen.

And we were thinking the same thing. We're like, where you're at right now does not equal you moving to the Netherlands in a few months. Well, she decided anyway. And she started acting like a woman who was moving to the Netherlands anyway.

She leaves this week. She's leaving exactly when she said she was going to leave. And by the way, she's got plenty of money to do it. Within a few months, she aligned herself up with job opportunities, with things that she's able to do online, which she'll be able to do there.

And here's the part that gets me. Is when I was a single mom with three kids and I was making hardly any money at all, the thing that I was most afraid of back then was that my kids would learn from watching me that life is something that happens to you and that life can be really, really hard. And I was someone that was full of grit, but I was making the best of it. I wanted something bigger, but I wasn't sure when or how that was going to happen.

I wasn't sure what my next steps would be or what my next path would be. She didn't learn that. She watched me build something that made no sense and now she's doing it in a country that she's never lived in at an age where I was still asking permission to have opinions about things. I didn't teach her that with a conversation or lesson that I sat down and explained everything to her.

She just watched it and she decided that she could do it for herself too. Kids are always watching and I am so incredibly grateful to her for that. I'm incredibly proud of her. I cannot believe, I mean I can believe it, but it still blows my mind how quickly she put this thing together.

You never know what opportunity is right around the corner when you align yourself to it and decide that even if it doesn't make sense, I'm going to do it anyway. So let's get back to the book. Let's be straight. I have all of the emotions.

Do I know how it's going to perform? No. I have no idea. None.

It might flop. Who knows? I don't know. But was I honest about what I wrote inside it?

Yes, completely. I was honest about what I'd lived and I was honest about how I was with myself and what I've actually learned and the stories that are inside it are real raw stories. It was hard to write the book. Am I scared about how it's going to be perceived by people who don't know me?

Yeah. Of course, I am. It's a book. It stays.

It's not like you can just put it back. I can't edit the caption or delete it off the internet. Someone I love might read it and be six chapters in and see a story that they recognize about themselves and they might not like how I saw it from my point of view. That can happen and that's terrifying.

But am I genuinely excited to finish something that I've wanted to finish for eight years? Absolutely. Yes. Enormously.

I am so proud of myself. All of these emotions are living inside my body at the same time and it's allowed and all of it's valid. I already know that there's more books in me. I know that there's more coming.

I can feel them. I can see them. Honestly, I don't really know why I wanted this. I don't know why I want to try to book.

I don't know why I want to try to journal that goes along with the book. I've thought about it a lot and the most answer I can have is, that I wanted my story out where somebody could find it, where I could speak my voice and speak openly. And I also wanted to be a piece of evidence for someone else that what you want is possible. That's literally the whole reason.

It's just evidence that if you want something, you can have it. So here's what I want from you today. It's two things. The first thing is, I want you to think about what you want, it doesn't make sense on paper.

I'm not talking about something that's like 10 years down the road from now. You're like, once I get to this point, I can get that thing. I want the one that's a little embarrassing, the one that makes zero sense and that you might be embarrassed to say it to somebody out loud, just like I was with my book with my husband. You don't have to have the money make sense or a perfect plan or anything like that.

I just want you to stop and start aligning yourself that this doesn't have to be a fantasy. This is something that can be available to you right now. You don't have to prove anything. You don't have to know the outcome or how you're going to get there.

It's something you can do right now. And that's when everything else starts moving and falling into place. I've watched it happen so many times in my own life. I've watched it happen in my client's life.

And now I've even watched it happen in my own daughter's life. The second, is that the book is out today. Unblocked is out today. It's on paperback and ebook and hardcover.

You get to choose. So go grab a copy, read it. And when you get to a point that hits, send it to the woman that you think would enjoy reading it as well. I would also love any kind of reviews because you know that reviews really help us get the word out.

I want the Unblocked Woman movement to continue on. And the best way to do that is for it to be bigger than book. And for us to be unblocked means that we see our patterns and we choose differently. We learn how to hold more and how to increase our capacity to love more, be more, do more.

Not out of place of friction or grind, but out of a place of openness and stepping into your power, the one that's uniquely yours. That's what being unblocked actually means to me. We're never going to be perfectly healed. Nothing's ever going to be perfectly finished.

But being honest and being you is something you can do now. So today, go do those two things and I will see you back here next week. Bye. Okay, before you go, don't let this become another episode that you listened to, loved, and then did nothing with.

Take what came up for you today and bring it into the mirror. Bring it. The decision that you're overthinking, the conversation you're avoiding, the pattern that you keep repeating, or simply say, here's what's happening. Help me see what I can't see.

The mirror knows your patterns, your enneagram, your human design, and it remembers the work you've already done. So the reflection is personal to you. Find the mirror in the show notes or at amysanders. co forward slash mirror.

And until next time, see it, shift it, and become magnetic.