Confidence Is Built Through Action, Not Before It with Tricia Conyers

today is a special podcast because as you know and you've been tuning in i have done a lot of solo podcasts i've been teaching a lot of things i think they've been great but today i brought on a very special guest her name is trisha conyers and she is on a mission to end the waiting the waiting to feel ready the waiting for doubt to disappear your doubt's not going to disappear until you actually move into action and that's what she talks about this is a space where women stop holding back and start stepping into their next bigger bolder version of themselves welcome to the unblocked woman podcast i'm amy sanders for years i believed the next level of my life the business would come from a better strategy working harder figuring out that perfect plan but eventually i saw the real truth the biggest ceiling in our lives is not strategy it's identity the patterns we don't see the subtle ways we play small the version of ourselves that we keep you to even when we know we're capable of more this podcast is where we bring those patterns into the light we talk about identity leadership growth and what it actually takes to become the woman who can truly hold the life and business she wants no fluff no performance just honest conversation about stepping fully into your power so go ahead and subscribe and follow the show and remember the moment you see the pattern you can finally break it hello everybody welcome back to the unblocked women podcast today is a special podcast because as you know and you've been tuning in i have done a lot of solo podcasts i've been teaching a lot of things i think they've been great but today i brought on a very special guest her name is tricia conyers and she is on a mission to end the waiting the waiting to feel ready the waiting for doubt to disappear guess what guys your doubt's not going to disappear until you actually move into action and that's what she talks about she has 20 years of experience in corporate leadership development and behavior-based change she's also founded the inspire her coaching and this is a space where women stop holding back and start stepping into their next bigger bolder version of themselves so as i am introducing her i'm sure you can see that yeah her and i have a lot of similarities with the things that we love to teach she also does some deep dives on confidence which we are going to be talking about today she has a lot of experience with the things that we love to teach confidence will which is a 10-dimensional framework that moves confidence from concept into daily practice and guess what if you've tuned into anything when i've talked about confidence confidence isn't just something that um some women have and others don't it's not something that you can't have it's something that she's going to talk to you about she also hosts her own podcast called every little model podcast and she's a co-author of own your expertise and last but not least before i actually let her talk is she has a new book coming out in september and her new book is also about confidence it's called confidence in action become your most brilliant brave and bold self it drops in september so make sure you make a note of that so without further ado let's welcome trisha to the podcast welcome i'm so excited to have you here tell me a little bit more about your story as we bring you on thank you amy i am thrilled to be here so thank you so much for sharing your incredible space with me i have been listening to your podcast and following along and like you said we are kindred spirits we we live and believe the same things you know we talk about the same things and nothing excites me more but to lean into a conversation with someone who just feels the same feels that i have so thank you so much for you know sharing your space with me i really appreciate it yes i'm so excited to be here and i'm so excited to be here with you and i'm so excited to be here with you i'm excited to have you here too i love it when i find a woman that's just on the same page as me teaching the same thing also on the other side of the world we don't live close no we don't live close that doesn't matter uh we just yeah kindred spirits so tell me a little bit about how you landed here and just your backstory so that people can get to know you a little bit better oh absolutely thank you for that i'll say that i if you had asked me five years ago would i be doing the thing that i am doing now the answer would have been no chance you know this wasn't a dream that i had for myself five years ago you know i was in a corporate career i had a long well-established corporate career with an organization that i love to this day i work with people who are the most amazing team members mentors bosses coaches and i had a career of 20 years with one particular organization i reinvented and pivoted myself number of times with that organization i had lots of different roles my last role there was part of the leadership team as the vp of learning and development and i had been in that role for quite some time and i kind of just reached a point where you know i was going to bed at night and there was just this lingering thought in my mind like is this it like is this just is this it like is this all that there is and as you do sometimes you know here i am and i would be constantly like scrolling on instagram and for whatever reason at that time in my life there was one quote on instagram that just kept showing up over and over and over again i could not escape it and it said if you're not living your life you're living someone else's life and i just i was like oh you know like there's just something in me that's kind of like is this it you know is this how i want to retire is this how i want to spend the rest of my days till the end of the year i don't know i don't know i don't know retire but i'll also say it was a very agonizing journey trying to figure that out because like i said i had been with this organization for a long time they were family to me and leaving was disloyal leaving meant i was being disloyal to them and so it was an extremely hard decision anyway fast forward to where we stand today obviously i did make that leap and i moved from having a full corporate career into the world of entrepreneurship and starting my own business i was building off of skills that i used in my corporate career because in the role of learning and development you know i designed learning experiences i was a facilitator i designed workshops i was a coach i did all of that type of work and i worked in the space of behavior change so that's what i brought with me but i brought it with me in a different way i wanted to serve women to help them recognize that all the things that they want the dreams that they have whether it is to be a ceo of a company or whether it is to be a CEO of a company or whether it is to be a to launch your own podcast that is all available to you and i just wanted to be able to help women be able to see how do they do that how do they step into that version of themselves that is not just drifting through life and going through the motions but it's actually really capable of they're capable of creating the life that they really want to lead and how do they move into that so the journey my own journey was one that like i said was very agonizing had there were lots of nights of crying tears about do i do this or do i not do this and i just wanted to do i not and agonizing if i even can i had never built a business i had never been an entrepreneur i'd always had the systems and support of this organization behind me so it was definitely a journey it was a big growth experience and i absolutely love i loved what i did then and i love what i do now you know people somebody said to me the other day they're like you just show up so much happier these days and i'm like well you know it it's just i love what i'm doing i love it so much and i think it just comes through yeah before we hit record i literally told i literally told trisha i was like so one of my favorite things about about my business is interviewing awesome women like it's so fun to just talk to women who are also in the weeds and doing the things and entrepreneurship you're like i've never done that before that paycheck is really comfortable when you just know that the money's coming even if you kind of did like a crappy job last two weeks the money's still coming the entrepreneurship is by far the biggest and fastest self-development journey you can ever take and even still yeah like even still i'm like on this journey and sometimes i'm like why do i do this i've been doing this for 20 years and even still i ask myself why and you said there were a lot of tears i'm willing to bet you still have a lot of tears and entrepreneurship i mean i know that i do i know that even a couple days ago i told my husband that i'm not going to do this he just laughs at me when i say this but because he knows it's like so not true because he knows me well but i'm like i think i'm just done doing this yeah and he's like what are you even saying right now i know we're gonna get into some other stuff but this other thing's on my mind that i'm just gonna like word vomit right now but um he also asked me just yesterday just yesterday we were sitting outside um watching the sunset and we're talking about this podcast and he goes amy the podcast and i've been doing the podcast now for a long time we're like 160 something episodes he goes why the podcast like why is that something you still want to do and i go i think part of it's because it's teaching me and other women that we can speak up and it's okay and that's part of my past and that's part of my trauma that i'm still healing from and having voicing my opinion and knowing that it's okay and i go but i also just i i hope that i'm touching women yeah you know in this work we hope we're touching women and it was not even one hour later like it was like maybe 30 minutes later i got the most incredible text from this woman who is way older and she's probably tuning into this one too way older than me and i had no idea that she tunes into my podcast no freaking clue she has never said i like your podcast she's she lives up the street from me and she said that podcast was spot on it was incredible i've just been forwarded it to all these women and i showed my screen to my husband i'm like i guess this is also why i do it yeah you know it's like it's incredible work but sometimes as an entrepreneur you don't get that like you don't always hear back the way you do when you're in corporate but anyway and i just a little bit of tangent but i want to i want to play on your tangent i want to add to it you know when when i was in corporate that same question this that question comes up for me all the time in terms of like am i doing the right thing i'm doing the right thing i'm doing the right thing is it adding any value you know should i even be doing this all of these questions right because they follow us in everything that we do and i remember thinking at one point in time i was like you know when i was in corporate i traded time for money i traded my time for salary and for money now in in this business and my in my coaching business and being an entrepreneur i change i trade my energy for impact you know i give my energy and i traded for the impact for the belief that it's having an impact on the lives of people and it's having an impact on the lives of the woman that i want to touch that it is making a change and your story is so great for that that example that you just gave you know that's the impact that's why we do it right i trade my energy i trade my time for that impact because that text means everything that means everything especially from someone that it's not necessarily my ideal client you know like i didn't know but then i was like whoa and then i even had to go back and listen to that podcast episode because i can't remember what i said i recorded that weeks ago i was like what even was that then i was like oh i'm glad that it's helped some people so just so do the thing right which is gonna what which is what is going to lead us into our conversation today it's all about confidence so many women look at other women we're so good at judging each other right we're so good at looking at someone else and be like oh man she's got all together oh my gosh she's so confident and we might not confident feel confident within ourselves so let's talk about that you have a confidence will and you like to have confidence in yourself and you like to have confidence in yourself and you like speaking about confidence so i am just going to turn it over to you and let you kind of go with whichever direction you want to take it and we'll we'll go from there well i want to tell you a story uh to start this off i remember when it was one of my first sort of weeks at university it just started there i was in this class i was this little girl from the caribbean had arrived in the uk you know at this big university with everyone else who all seemed to know each other by the way and you know like so many of them had been in school together and they all knew each other so it was definitely didn't feel like an even platform that i was starting on everyone else knew each other and i remember in one of those first couple of weeks being in a class having worked on a project and we were doing a presentation and watching one of my colleagues standing at the front of the room presenting with an air that just reeked of confidence you know it was just everything that just seemed that the way that they spoke what they were saying how they were dealing with questions how they how they held the attention in the room all of these things and i just remember sitting there thinking my reserved self will never have that i'll never have that and in that moment a belief took root in me which took root in me and i was like oh my god i'm so sorry i'm so sorry i'm so sorry i'm so sorry but which was a confidence had one look and it was that and i didn't have it and i was never gonna have it and i do believe that that followed me for a long time it showed up in many different ways in my own life and and one of the ways that it showed up now this is both my strength and my vulnerability is that i love to learn but so i would always be enrolled in some course that i was doing but i was also in enrolling in the courses not only was i just trying to learn but i was trying to to guide me and i was trying to guide me and i was trying to guide me and i was trying to gather up the credentials and the certifications and all those things that i thought was going to make me feel confident right because it was like if i could just have more if i could just keep stacking that stuff that feeling would arrive that feeling would arrive i love this so much i just i i love this so much okay pause on the story because i want to hear the rest of it but this is what i did too i was a fitness instructor most fitness instructors have one or two certifications within fitness i had a bachelor's degree in fitness and i had a bachelor's degree in exercise science and 30 certifications to just try and be enough like if i get this one more thing and i even did it with my life coaching i have five different types of life coaching certifications because one's not enough right it's like we do that thinking that once we do all that stuff once we have that then then i will feel like i'm enough then i'll feel like i will be seen as confident like i'm guilty of this too okay continue on continue yeah no and just to say that i feel that that is one of the most dangerous beliefs that we have as women is the fear is thinking that i have to wait to feel confident and the ways we wait are so creative it's like we're saying one of the ways we wait is by stacking credentials right i'm just going to go course after course after course now obviously there's a relationship between competence and confidence and feeling like you know your craft well enough to do it but the what we do is we turn that around and we make it the danger part of that which is to be confident and to feel confident and to feel confident and to feel confident which is stacking more and more and more you know certifications and accreditations and all of those things right and then so we're so creative about the ways that we wait we wait for confidence by saying i need more time we wait for confidence by over planning we wait for confidence by you know needing to gather everybody's opinion about something right you know so we're so creative we don't call it waiting necessarily but that's essentially what we're doing is waiting for that feeling to arrive and what i've learned from my own experience is that we're so creative for myself in my own journey and in working with women is that that's never how it arrives it arrives as you take action it arrives and you take the small deliberate actions the ones that feel uncomfortable doing hard things stepping out of the space stepping into something new and just doing small actions that compound day by day and building up for yourself evidence evidence of your capability of doing things you didn't know you could do before and that's when it comes after i always say it's like it's a bus with a funny timing system if you stand at the bus stop and you wait for it the timer goes in the wrong direction it just gets further and further and further away and when you say that's it i'm done waiting here it's taking too long and you start walking suddenly the bus pulls up alongside you as if it was there all along yeah i love this it reminds me of so when i first started teaching fitness i learned i mean fitness is just like ingrained in me and will be i think forever i started teaching myself fitness routines when i was 12 and by the way there wasn't really fitness clothing back in the early 90s it wasn't much of a thing but anyway it reminds me of like when i first started getting certified to teach fitness the very first certification i ever got i got it and i did it anyway meaning that the first classes that i taught i taught at this some really tiny gym um i was making ten dollars per class which by the way when you have to prepare for a class and then you teach the class then you clean up a class ten dollars is not very much but i did it anyway because as i was doing it was teaching me how to cue i was teaching me how to get better was teaching me how to do the things but it was in a small kind of very small gym to where there would only be like five people in the class but it's exactly what you were talking about like i did it anyway because i knew i loved fitness and i wanted to inspire and be in front of people and so i did it anyway and i kept teaching these people and i did all the mess ups on them but by the time i was in the big gym i was totally confident in my craft but at that point i'd already had all these hours of practice so it's like exactly what you're saying in real time with being a fitness instructor like being on top of the cueing being on top of the music making sure that you're talking to them inspiring them there's like a lot that goes on that people don't think about when it comes to teaching a fitness class but like that's exactly what i did at 18 years old and it's served me well because i look back at what i did then at those at that age and i'm like oh i can do that again here differently in this new thing exactly and i love that story because again what you're doing is you were laying down new foundations in your brain right it's the relay because our brain is this prediction machine it's always looking for where is this worked or not worked before how do i keep myself safe in this situation you know and and what do i do here and so by doing that by doing it anyway to your point you just do it anyway you teach you teach your brain you lay down new evidence in your brain which is what it uses for the future predictions so when you face something hard again so now when i'm in a room of 500 people where i'm teaching a class it's like i know i can make it through that instead of you know trying to wait for it all to be perfect i can't put myself out there in front of a class until i know for sure that i can do the cueing that i do know what i have to say that's the waiting the holding ourselves back rather than the doing it anyway mm-hmm and i didn't do it perfect no i think that's important like we're not we're not gonna do anything perfect perfect's not a thing yeah we think it's a thing but it really just holds us back yeah i would agree with you i shared this post on my instagram the other day where i said you know go and scroll all the way down all the way down and look at the first videos that i ever made that i put out there they're horrible they're messy they're scrappy the lighting's bad i don't speak well you know i don't speak well i don't speak well i don't speak well i don't speak well so they're edited terribly there's nothing particularly good about them but that was me that was me growing in front of everyone that was me doing it anyway that was me putting myself out there me taking the risk me learning from it and i could have deleted them all i could have curated this lovely perfect instagram profile of like this is what i want you to see but i think the story is way more important than the curated version because that's the truth the truth is that even where i am now i'm still doing it and i'm still doing it and i'm still doing it and i'm still growing three years from now you know these what i put out today might look really different from from it so it's recognizing that it's a journey it's a journey and when i talk about the book you know sometimes people ask me it's like okay well you know do you see yourself as an expert in confidence and i often i say no i wrote this book because i think it was a lot of what i needed i needed it back when i was that girl you know starting off at university and sort of i don't know how to build this for myself i don't know how to do this for myself what are the things that i can do that would make me show up in a different way that would make me feel like i can do things that are outside of my comfort zone in my safe space so i don't see myself as the expert in and i see myself as the expert student of it yeah we do and what we become right we become like we're the student of whatever it is we're fascinated by and by being a student and learning all the things then we want to teach which is so normal in life it's like then we're so excited about this thing we're like can we who else can we tell about this this like really worked for me i love this like how can i help other people get to where i am now it's just progression it's it's so normal part of the human experience yeah exactly yeah so walk me through maybe you already did through just our conversation but walk me through what your confidence will is what it looks like yeah so the framework i'll give it to you at the highest level so i like to say that your most authentic confident self comes from working on three different parts of yourself it comes from working on your brilliant self your brave self and your bold self and those three things together will make up your most authentic confident self and when i talk about brilliance brilliance is not just like kind of what i know but it's knowing yourself this is the i know my values i know my self i know my self i know my self i know my self i know my self i know my self strengths i know what i stand for i know what energizes me and what depletes me i know how i think i know how my thoughts impact my actions right this is all my brilliance my brilliance is about knowing me brilliance is about anchoring you and who you are in your authenticity and knowing that really well so that's your brilliant self your brave self is all about challenging you so your brave self is about going after goals setting goals out there that you want to achieve and working toward them taking action taking micro action learning to move through the discomfort of new action right and understanding your relationship with what how do i feel when things don't go my way when they fail if you want to call it call it that you know like they didn't go as i planned or as i thought how do i react to that how do i deal with failure and how do i develop my resilience your brave self is also about investing in yourself right developing your competencies and growing your skill sets in terms of where you need to and then your bold self that part of yourself is all about elevation right and it's about visibility and elevation a lot of women that come to me talk about how much they fear visibility like they know their work they know what they have they have the expertise and the experience but they really fear being seen and standing up for it and putting themselves out there so your bold self is all about claiming your wins understanding what they say about you owning your thought leadership and your perspective and being able to put that out there your bold self is also about who you surround yourself with the network that you develop and the relationships that you curate and then your bold self is about also about how you communicate your ideas right how you how you share how you speak how you dress the thought all those things also influence your confidence so the so that's the model in a nutshell it's these three cells that we nurture and they're very practical actions that you can do in each of the pieces that are inside each of those selves to nurture your brilliance nurture your bravery and nurture your boldness and as you work on them they all feed each other right so as you develop your network and you go first and you reach out to new people and you get on a podcast can you share your perspective and all of those things that helps you learn more about what you think and deepen your thoughts and deepen your your ideas about your vision and what you are so that relates back to your brilliant self and it encourages you to see how you could do new things for yourself which is your brave self seeing new possibilities and new goals that you can set for yourself so all you know influence each other they're not discreet in their own way but you know we need models in our life because models help us to dissect big conceptual things into something that we can understand and that's the real purpose of the model is to take this conceptual topic of confidence like what is it this thing that i think this other person just has and i don't and actually dissect it into this is what makes it up and then what makes it better and then these are the practical actions that you can do in each one of these areas to nurture and strengthen that for yourself because you already have all three it's there you just have to find the way to elevate them to lift them up and to lean into them more so that's the model i actually love this yeah it's a different take that's why i was excited to talk to you because um it's like we have similar things but we're going to explain them differently and it's going to land for some people the way you explain it better than the way i would explain it i think that's a good way to do it you know that's why it's like this work is so important and i love that you're doing it and i really love that you call it your brilliant self your brilliant self because we're brilliant we were born brilliant like just just owning that like it's okay to own that you're brilliant but your brilliance also means that you're connected to your core values who you actually are and you have to challenge those yeah when you're in certain sticky situations or when you're in situations that don't jive with you you're going to have to challenge those with you recognize that and ask i mean i'm just talking maybe for you this is my theory of what you just said but as ask yourself the question like is this truly who i am and who i want to be with is this serving my brilliance yeah when you know yourself when when you move from self-trust it would help feed the other two yeah absolutely your brilliant self is about knowing you know trusting your intuition and trusting your intuition and trusting your intuition and trusting your intuition knowing your values leaning into that you know trusting your strengths as well it's about your self-awareness and your your self-growth and how you nurture yourself it's all of those things and your point about you know investing in your self-awareness you know your connection with your values coming back and knowing that i think that's probably one of the very first things that i talk about in that part of the the model is about values and because that is at the heart of how we show up how we make decisions the choices that we make and it's what we come back to in all the moments where we feel off-centered and off-balance even if it's not intentional is what we're coming back to right it's like this doesn't feel right because of something and we're coming back to those values that are really guiding us and that are helping us to grow and when we allow ourselves to be guided by those values our life gets to feel so much easier that's where you feel more joy that's where you feel more connected like it's when you're connected to yourself i think it's like the best thing you can do brave well i also want to talk about brave i love how you laid it out but i also wanted to talk about it from the perspective of people don't like to feel brave it's like this emotion that we look at other people who maybe are practicing it like when someone else is doing something brave we're like wow and we think it's so cool right and we might compliment them or this person is being brave but when it comes to being brave when we're doing the thing when we're challenging ourselves and we're developing ourselves and we're doing the new thing it feels uncomfortable feel discomfort and we're like ah being brave is kind of scary yeah it is shouldn't it be because it's that's the word right uh yeah and brave doesn't always have to be big yeah you know brave doesn't have to be huge you know what's brave for you and what's brave for me might be too big but it doesn't have to be big it doesn't have to be very different things brave for me might literally just be speaking up in a meeting sharing an opinion where i always sit at the back of the room and i just don't you know brave for you might be going after you know a big promotion or you know going after or writing a book or you know doing something like that that's that's brave for you right so so when i talk about goals and brave i mean it's it's just it's stretching you just outside of where you are now but the thing with between goals and confidence and in the work that i do with women we always put a goal that we want to work on because it's in service of going after that goal that we grow the confidence right that if we just try to do confidence by itself it's like in service of what we have to have like moving towards something to be able to grow and step into the new version of ourselves for that thing that we want to achieve otherwise it's abstract it's just in service of nothing tangible so connecting it with something is really important and those goals they don't they can be different for everyone it might be you know i want to write a book or it might be i want to launch a podcast or it might just be i want to apply to you know join the committee at my kids school i want to take part as one of the parent representatives in my kids class that's not something i've ever done before right so brave it doesn't have to be big no brave can just be just the edge of where you are and that's what i'm trying to do and that's what i'm trying to do you are now and just encouraging you like you know drawing you to just step into just something a little bit bigger yeah i love this and of course i'm going to attach it to a story that happened to me this year so when i was when i was younger i was so scared to speak up about certain things i was bubbly personality i was popular i was like these things but when it came down to like speaking up or voicing my opinion or asking for something i was so scared i would do it wrong i was so scared i would fell so i did not all my friends in high school tried out for this acapella choir and they were going to go on this tour and it was going to be amazing and by the way i don't have i don't have a bad voice i don't have the most amazing voice but i definitely have a voice that's good enough to be in a choir i was so scared to apply like to actually audition for this choir that i didn't do it and i look back in that moment i was and i was like of course i would have made it people that sing worse made the choir i was so scared i was so scared i was so scared but i didn't do it because i was so scared of like that rejection that could possibly happen it was it was available like it could happen that he would have not let me be part of this choir right highly unlikely but anyway i didn't do it so a year ago i auditioned for my city choir just so funny i'm like in this city choir but i think that my like my younger self needed that and by the way i did make this city choir and it is harder to get into this choir than it would at the high school one but i think i just want to prove it to myself so that was something that was but my point is is i was still so scared to try out when i walked through that door it was scary so it could be something as silly as my choir that i'm now part of that you do i'm brave the last thing i want to say and you can add to this is whenever we actually do do the brave thing whatever it is however big or small it is when you do it no matter what the outcome is the outcome might not go in your favor you feel amazing after because you did it you always don't have regrets so you're like i did that anyway yeah i like to tell women practice saying i did that like that's the free you know like practice saying i did that you know and make that connection because i'll say i did that you know look at how look at how brave i was or look at how bold i was or you know look at what this says about what this says about me i wish i had a uh as good a choir story as yours but my choir story is when i was in primary school the school choir and i didn't make it and she made me audition like twice and then i didn't make it and there were like five of us that didn't make it and we used to have to hang out in a classroom on our on our own while the rest of everybody else was in the choir so i still carry that one with me and i'm still carrying that one with me and i'm still carrying i carry that memory and i have not put myself out for a choir like i'm doing that that was miserable yes but literally by not doing that i i missed out on a lot yeah i know that i would have made the choir i knew that like it was just that tiny fear that what if i didn't at that time i missed out on a couple really amazing vacations they all went on i missed out on being in that choir with some of my best friends they still talk about those memories because we're still friends today and it's just like i'm still here and i'm still here and i'm still here and i'm still here it's like the things that you don't do because of the fear can be the things that you regret most later even if it's something as silly as that and i'm sorry i'm sorry that that was your experience i've come to love it it's okay and then being bold i love this because visibility is another thing that can feel so vulnerable and scary and making those connections that's what opens up doors and and helps you like that's what creates like an amazing life right is creating these connections and the visibility and elevating what you share how you share and i love what you said about just even going back like don't delete that you haven't deleted what you use i did the same thing like if you go back on that instagram feed it looks it looks pretty rough but that's okay like this is part of it don't judge us don't judge where we are today where you are today with someone who's further down the road okay exactly always measure backwards right that's what i'm saying and i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry but dan sullivan tells us in the gap in the game you say you always measure always measure backwards you measure backwards by how far i've come not by how far you have to go the goalpost in terms of where you want to go will always move as you get closer and closer to goals and you grow and you become bigger and bolder and braver and all those things that that's going to keep going because you're going to keep moving that post in terms of the thing you want to do next so you never measure your growth or your success by what's out in the future you measure by looking backwards in terms of how far you've come were you before and how how far have you grown and how far have you come yeah so good i have loved this conversation hey so your book comes out in september but then you also have um just a free pdf that people can access can you tell us about that as well and i'll make sure that all of this is in the show notes oh yeah so the pdf was actually it's a quiz that you can do in terms of what's my confidence superpower so it tells you it's a short quiz that you do and then it tells you which of the three archetypes are your confidence superpower so are you a quiet powerhouse a fearless trailblazer or are you a connected visionary which as you can see probably relate back to your strength of which one do you nurture the most your brilliance your bravery or your boldness it's kind of connecting you back with which one is your natural strength and what are your growth edges in there as well so yeah i'm going to go back to that and i'm going to go back to i can make sure that you have the link for that so that you could try it out and you can find out what's your natural tendency and your strengths and then you can start to think about where do i want to move which part of this do i want to move more into yeah i love that too okay so a couple questions for you as we're just kind of wrapping up here what does it mean for you to be unblocked to be an unblocked woman what does that look like for you and how are you practicing that in your life today i think i definitely still practice this a lot in my life today it's not yeah exactly it is not you know i figured it out i've got the magic nugget here so when i think about this question i think about it from the two angles from the angle of the past and the future so what does it mean to be unblocked so part of it means to me not carrying the beliefs and the stories from the past into the present right the beliefs the stories the patterns that you talk about carrying those things into the present and then if i turn the other way and i look out to the future it's not allowing the sense of fear or apprehension about what might be out there and what might be coming and all the unknowns that i don't have control over allowing that to affect how i operate in the present as well you know and i know for me one of my patterns is when i feel that fear i try to want to control even more so i want to do more and control more more because I feel the fear of not knowing what's happening there so it's it comes from both sides it comes from not bringing the stories of the past into the present and not bringing the anxieties of the future into the present so that in the present I can live from that live and move from that place of ease which is actually a word that you used when we started out you know so what does it mean it means being able to live in the present from ease and alignment and with my own power and not allowing the old stories of the past or the anxieties of the future to sort of just get in the of that I love how you answered it it's so spot on and if we live and we live the way you just said the entire world would be better off and we would feel so much more peace ease compassion love joy all the things that we're like climbing and searching for everywhere looking yeah and they're available to us like right now yeah okay so one last question um by the way everybody I know you guys love her she's amazing so I'll make sure all of her information is in the show notes as well um one last question would be what would you want to leave them with what is one takeaway that you would want to leave the audience with today I want anyone listening to take away the whatever you're dreaming of in the future whatever is out there is available to you it's just about taking the smallest steps in order to get there we can get so intimidated by the big picture that the big picture is is the you know the final outcome or the outcome that we're working towards if not the final one but it's about the small steps that you take and the small steps that you take they they compound that's the thing if you just take one every single day so if you have that dream if you have that goal whatever it is if you have that dream if you have that goal uh to start a business to apply for a promotion to start a podcast write a book whatever it might be one small step every day compounds toward that thing that you're dreaming about it doesn't you don't have to wait for it to be perfect you don't have to wait to have it all figured out you don't have to wait to have all the credentials you don't have to wait for all these things but rather just the one small step and it can just be really small each day one phone call one one 10 minute journaling session you know one 10 minute journaling session you know one 10 minute journaling session five minute chat gpt conversation while you bring small ideas it could be anything right but one small action every day compounds and it's all within reach if you just take one small action every day i love it one small action every day and you really can build the life that you want it's available to you i always like to say if it's on your heart then that's your heart saying hey let's do this your brain will tell you why you can't but your heart's going to tell you and show you why you can so listen to that thank you so much for being on the podcast i really enjoyed our conversation you're such a beautiful person i feel honored to have you with us so thank you absolutely thank you amy it's been beautiful to talk to you today i so enjoy your podcast so i want to say thank you for all that you put out into the world and everything that you share all the ideas the concepts the tips the everything i listen to so many of them and i take away from every single one so thank you for sharing that thank you that means a lot to us you know you always want to know how things are hitting because we just talk we just talk into oblivion and hope people have anyway yes thank you so much and guys uh thanks for tuning in if you like this make sure that you're subscribed if you're not already and i'll be back here next week with another podcast we will see you then bye thanks for listening to the unblocked woman listen you don't rise by waiting you rise by leading so if this episode sparked a shift send it to a woman who needs to hear next and if you're ready to go deep join the unblocked woman collective or begin the unblocked method at amysanders.